It’s a virtual fantasy land here with rabbits, stars, birds, and feathers `;~)

pendant2

I want to thank everyone who liked my Bead Soup Necklace, I think I will call it “Bambi.” I agree with Amber Dawn Inventive Soul that is definitely shouts out BAMBI `;~) I had so much fun making this necklace! Shannon of For My Sweet Daughter made the beautiful copper etched rabbit pendant and the birdsnest too! Please go and take a loot look at her beautiful work `;~)

I hope to get back into the studio tonight and make some earrings to go with this necklace. So we will see where that takes me `;~)

herb_haul

Right now, I’m so excited cause my huge herb haul came in on Monday and I have been dying to get into them!!! I spent Tuesday night reading up on some ideas and I can’t wait to try them out! I also have a couple custom orders on my plate at the moment that I am really excited about `;~)

I’m also going to try my hand at making incense cones! I have some makko powder that I’m just itching to mix into some of my standard recipes and see how they compare. I might start offering incense loose and cone if it works like I’m hoping `;~)

Peacock  feather tattoo!

I finally got my peacock feather tattoo that I have been wanting for the last year. I’m so very happy with it!

I hope each and every one of ya’ll have a blessedly beautiful weekend `;~)
bb,

A New Year to Get Back to Me

I thought I would try a new concept for my ideas and goals for the new year. I usually do write them out, but it doesn’t work so well for me. My goal for 2011 is to be more creative and involved, so what better way to start off the new year of creativity than to be creative?

I have this on my fridge and will keep it there all year so that I don’t get sidetracked and lost in the numbness as I did last year. Last year wasn’t that bad all things considered, no where near as bad as 2009! I don’t think I’d ever really had a year as bad as 2009!!

But anyway, I really want to work on staying focused and staying on track. It is so easy for me to lose focus. I hate that about the A.D.D.

New Years was spent having lunch and just hanging out with a good friend and then I spent the night crafting and making jewelry. It was a great way to start my new year! Being Creative!

Woot!

WORD!

I can’t begin to tell you how much I love words. I love to think about how people use words. I didn’t talk until I was around 4 years old. I think I just soaked up all the words and conversations around me. There is a lot you can learn by not speaking and just listening. Later growing up, this love extended to spelling and etymology.

My two favorite books as a child were “Are you My Mother” By P.D. Eastman and “The Foot Book” by Dr. Seuss. Which is only slightly ironic considering my aversion to feet `;~) Interestingly enough, both books are about perceptions.

I listen to not only the words, but the inflections placed on each word. Which word and syllable was stressed, at what point did the speaker get more animated or more closed. How did they phrase their point? Are they passionate about the subject? How does that passion come through in their words? In their actions?

Magickally speaking, how one phrases their words, spells, chants, and even sigils can make a significant difference in the outcome. It is the difference between getting that new job you are hankering for and getting a new responsiblity tacked onto your current job with no monetary increase, I might add. It is the difference in coming up with the money to pay one bill or enough money to pay all your bills.

There is a difference between thinking positively and being positive. For instance, saying “My rent check will not bounce” rather than “I will have enough to pay my rent” or even better saying “I will have $600 dollars to pay my rent and get groceries.”

It took a long time to see this difference, but it is there and it is subtle as all magick is. One niggle of doubt can overcome all the positive. It does not have to be obviously negative to be negative. Negativity is an insidious thing. It is like that monster in your closet, just waiting for a crack.

Here it Comes, Another Dawning of You

Well, my crafting bug has been biting hard for the last couple of days as I’ve found some wonderful blogs on jewlery making, beading, sewing, and more! 

Some of my favorite things I’ve found today? This skull cameo fabric and this boar’s head fabric at spoonflower.com. A hipster shopgirl apron pattern at burdastyle.com and a 6 gored skirt. Spoonflower.com looks amazing and I have some ideas I want to try out for fabrics! Maybe some coven or sigil specific designs.

The BIGGEST <<and I do mean biggest>> Bead give-a-way ever is happening over at Denise Yezback Moore’s blog. A total of 7.5 lb’s of beads!!! And I’m enjoying all the Bead Soup Party folks designs! I’m thinking about getting in on it next time, it looks like way too much fun!

Also, this weekend is my coven’s Litha which I will be hosting. It’s exciting to have my covener’s over and to share my hearth. I’ve been enjoying leading the ritual writing committee and all of the excitement and energy that we pour into what we are doing. Sometimes, when I get down and don’t want to do my work, all I have to do is think about the dedication of my fellow covener’s. When I get ranty, I call my sounding board and I’m done and over it. I hope she knows how much of a blessing she is.

It seems this week has been focused on Meditation and keeping up on your practices in the blogsphere. Everywhere I turn,  there were posts on meditation. Miss Sugar over at  Charmed I’m Sure She brought up several good points. They have been rattling around in my head for a few days. Firstly, meditation may not be for everyone, but there are things that one can do to clear one’s mind and gain focus. I’m going to look deeper into the Japa practice that she mentions as it seems I kind of already do it `;~)

For I’m always chanting and singing ‘Song to the Secret Name of the Star Goddess’ that I posted about here. Nothing moves me like that song does `;~) It sets me at peace almost instantly and I am as content at as a purring cat.  As to the rest of my daily practice? eh…. I dont really follow a routine practice and it has quickly been becoming a focal point that I need to change that.

The cornerstone of my practice has been that I get to see the moon every night as I’m leaving work. She and I commune for a few minutes and then I head home. So in some ways, I am very connected though, I no longer feel that it is enough.

Miss Sugar also talked about what one is looking to accomplish with their magic. Ya know, I’ve never really thought about it like that. I’m also fairly sure that there are plenty of others who haven’t either. I’ve never really *used*  magic to accomplish goals. Except for one instance where my life and my children’s lives were threatened. And no, we didn’t engage in a ‘magical battle,’ with the help of my HP and his partner, another HP, we called magic to persuade the abuser to turn themselves into the police. The results were not as we expected, but he was quickly caught.

Anyway, this post is not about that `;~)  So where was I? hmm, yes, practice and goals. So just what do I want to accomplish? What are my goals?

A strong foundation
I want to build a foundation to keep me up when I falter, as I have almost no Earth in my natal chart, and I tend to be very flighty… The only birt of Earth in my chart is my rising sign, Virgo. This has been acerbated by not having a foundation in my formative years. I moved an average of every three years until I was 23. Roots? What Roots???

Focus Control and Follow-through
I taught myself not to have goals or expect anything because everything was always pulled out from under me when we moved unexpectedly. So while the upside to this was that I was very good at living in the now, I didn’t know how to prepare for the future. I still don’t 😦 Growing up, I never thought about those things as the future was infinitely untangibly beyond my control.

Ahh, control… Why do I let you slip through my fingers, why do I give you away as if you were a bad penny? This is the truth of it. I give you away or I simply refuse to take up your reigns. Honestly, I severely dislike being in control. Why, you ask? Because there is no one else to blame if I am in control.

Oh, yes, I am brutally honest with myself most of the time. *snort*

And follow through? psshshshshsht! Seriously? I have to much fire and air for my ideas to be grounded or manifested at times. I’d rather be the architect and let someone else build it`;~) Once something is no longer a challenge, forget it – I’m not interested. Think outside the box? oh hell yeah… What’s a box, btw?

Honestly, the only time I really complete things is when I am facing near anihilation by deadline `;~) Like, I’m having upto 20 people at my house on Saturday and I still  haven’t mowed, weed eated, or cleaned my house… Though my neighbor is supposed to mow and I have to borrow the weedeater from another neighbor… Nor have I made my dress or my special item for the ritual… And I’ve changed my special item like 3 times now…

So gues what my to-do list is like for tonight… hahahahah!!!!

So just what are my goals?
I want to be able to pay all my bills, including enough to afford a newer car. I want to be able to buy that dress or go to that workshop. I dno’t want to have to know Peter and Paul… I want to be able to create beautiful things. I want to  be of service to my community. I want to achieve my calling.

So know that I know what I want to accomplish and my goals. I just have to figure out how to get there. But I think the figuring it out part is how you get there `;~)

Blessed be my lovelies!

Leaves and blossoms unfurling

I think I overdid it this weekend. I only worked for two hours out in the herb garden. I weeded and pulled up roots from an old plant that was no more. Picked up pinecones from the tree falling on my house last month. But today, I feel like the living dead. And not in a good way at all. UGH!

I so need to get my bloodwork done so we can determine what is wrong and get to work on making my life less painful.

I was looking at books this weekend and hoping to find something to help me with what I was talking about my previous post, Do the Hustle. Most of the books I found had to do with how to be happy or have a better sex life. I only found a few that touched on anything close to what I was looking for. So I picked this one TamingYour Gremlin.

You have to start somewhere, as I’m often said to others `;~) It doesn’t really matter where you start as long as you do!

Oh, and I made an about me page entitled Life in the ShellyVerse

Do the Hustle

I love it when I find or read something that clicks and gives me one of those AHA moments. For instance, this article What’s your Side Hustle From Escape from Cubicle Nation did just that for me tonight…

Suddenly, it clicked, the reason none of my ideas, dreams, or goals have succeeded. I’ve never hustled for it- never put in the time and put the elbow grease into anything I’ve wanted. I’ve created some amazing jewelry and made wonderful incenses, but it has never gone anywhere. I have never gone the extra mile!

This was my latest jewelry project. This beaded cuff was designed for a very special friend’s iniation. It is made of sterling silver wire and contains 52 swarovski crystals. It is one of my favorite pieces `;~) So, yes, I can create beautiful work and I am good at it.

So what has kept me from hustling it? What has kept me from doing the work? Honestly, nothing!

It’s not that I expect things to just fall in my lap, though on occasion it does happen `;~) It’s more that I’ve …. hmmmm…. never developed those skills. I don’t know how to drive and push myself. I don’t know how to overcome that moment when nothing happens after the launch. I don’t know how to follow through. I don’t want to get into why I did not develop these very necessary skills. It is in my past and it is over and done.

So in many ways, part of my work this year is going to be developing those skills. Learning how to follow through and not give up throwing my hands in the air and saying “oh well.” I don’t want to live an “oh well” kind of life.

I’m tired of living a life where I am constantly hearing how much potential I have. Or how smart I am. and not having a clue what to do with it! And no, I do not know how to apply myself. What the hell does that mean anyway? To apply myself??? I’ve never understood this.

When I see what I’ve written, I want to erase it all. It makes me worry that maybe I really do have mental issues, some kind of social disorder or that maybe I really am totally mental. Maybe I should get in therapy. But then I would have to drag all these old issues back up. This is not where this post was meant to go, so I may indeed erase some of those mental shuffling that is going on here.

It’s funny how writing brings out all these things. SHould I filter myself? Isn’t that what I’ve done all my life? Filtered myself down until I could fit into the molds of society?